it's time to change my pants

O.K. So I'm driving on the interstate this morning on my way to work on our never gonna be ready to move in next week no matter what we do to it, latest money-pit, lovely brick home with loads of potential.

I'm jamming to some Christmas tunes on the radio, enjoying the quiet of my van because I am alone. I'm almost giddy because I'm rarely alone. Being alone sounds sad and lonely, but when you have four children, being alone has nearly the same effect as eating large amounts of chocolate that you don't have to share or spending a day at the spa. Let me say it again while I bask in the beauty of the words themselves...I'm alone! Eeeek! Fantastic!

I hired a babysitter for the day in order to actually get some work done which inevitably includes running to our neighborhood home improvement type store for "stuff" and being the lunch-getting person to feed our friends who come and volunteer their time because they feel sorry for us, are biding their time until they can find better friends, they love us and just want us to finally settle. Somewhere. For the love of God and all things holy, could you just get somewhere and stay a while, they plead? But I digress.

So I'm driving on the interstate and notice a blue truck up ahead, pulled rather far off the shoulder of the road in a semi-gully. Hmm. Wonder what he's doing down there.

Well.

As I get closer, I see that he is changing his clothes. His pants to be specific. Right there on MY side of his blue truck. The side where all the cars with PEOPLE in them are whizzing by.

After I realize I've just been half-mooned by some stranger wearing tighty-whities, I begin to laugh. Out loud. For a long time. I am once again glad I'm alone. I begin to think about why someone would choose to change their pants on the side of the road because that's just the kind of gal I am. And I continue to laugh. Why? Because y'all, it's just funny.

I wonder why Mr. Gottachangemypantsrightnow has decided to take his clothes off on the side of the road for passersby to see. Has he spilled some boiling hot McCoffee on his lap? Does he suffer from incontinence, poor thing? Perhaps unbeknownst to Mr. Gottachangemypantsrightnow, a family of ants have moved into his truck and are marching up his leg in search of a new place to conquer and call home, and Mr. Gottachangemypantsrightnow in an effort to save himself, has decided these pants have got to go. Right this instant! Or maybe he's fashion conscious and just realized that his pants just don't go with his shirt. I just wonder why, that's all.

Well, I guess I'll never know for sure. But if I may, I'd like to offer a small bit of advice to Mr. Gottachangemypantsrightnow or anyone else thinking of whipping off the side of the road for a wardrobe change.

1. Kindly step around to the side of the vehicle NOT facing all the known world.

or


2. Invest in a snazzy pair of boxers.


Thank you. That's all.